Vatican City - November 21st 2009

Great timing: the Rosaries have just arrived. A couple of days too late perhaps but after that sacrilegious night of blasphemy they might still be handy. It's just as well that this isn't a very superstitious (or religious) household or we would really be in trouble. Did I tickle your curiosity yet? Good, read on.

I really didn't intend to include the Vatican City in the list of my culinary adventures (some websites don't even list it as a country) but I was having dinner with friends a few months ago and they said they would have loved to come to the V dinner if it was going to be the Holy See... what was I to do? Skip over it? I took up the challenge and it was another great success. And it really is a country so it's not like I was doing something that wouldn't fit with the rest of this story.

Of course, most people - yours truly included - would automatically assume that a dinner at the Vatican would be based primarily on Italian food, right? True to some extent (after all, the Vatican chef is Italian - Simone Carconi if you really must know) but the Pope is German, so would sausages and sauerkraut have been more appropriate? In the end I let my imagination run wild and did a search on Google for dishes containing the words "pope, papa, priest, prete and even Catholic recipes". You'd be amazed to discover (I was) that there is such a thing as a blog that contains nothing but Catholic recipes. Then again, why not? Technology is for everyone to use, even those who have been doing the same thing for the last 2000 years. In fact, talking about technology and religion, a colleague of mine was commenting the other day about how convenient it is to follow Mass online on Sundays. In her words: "I don't even have to get out of my pajamas"... but I am digressing here...

My faithful followers may recall that I had dared Eric to dress up as the Pope for this special night.... well, he didn't but he did come up with an hysterically funny and amazingly creative priest outfit... unfortunately he won't let me publish the photo of the complete outfit until he retires so you'll just have to trust me when I say that the man will end up in hell.... Knowing Eric, he'll probably shrug it off saying that he'll be in good company! My role was that of the devil that leads you in temptation (was that the devil or Eve, can't remember) and I even found some cute little horns that lit up (see photo). Laurel let me borrow her choir outfit to complete the costume (sorry about the tomato sauce, I hope it washed off...) and she wore one herself to keep up the good humor. Peter wore a saintly expression and a priest outfit and Dan showed up wearing his best impression of a Vietnamese priest (including sunglasses and slicked back hair, apparently very popular amongst priests in Vietnam...). Pat brought his old First Communion and Confirmation photos so I also showed them mine. Ned didn't dress up: he says that Melissa read the invite and didn't tell him of the optional godly outfit. That's quite all right... we can't all be clergy people! Dan & Peter brought Elaine with them who showed up with the loveliest pink roses arrangement (and she makes a killer 5 layer chocolate cake but that's for another story). Joanne came as her holy saintliness (she's such a saint!). And even Melissa made a special appearance just before dessert. Wow, what a night!

Those who have been guests at my dinners would have noticed that there are usually no children. This time however I made an exception. Laurel's friend Angeka (sorry, I just can't remember the spelling, more sins!) was visiting from Germany with her daughter and so they came along with Laurel and Pat... Well, guess what? The little angel was asleep by the time they arrived and didn't wake up during the entire dinner. That's jetlag to you and me! Now, it's not that I am truly evil, I know children are our future and all that but, at dinner parties they're only fun if there's other kids they can play with, right? Surely, a 4 year old would hate to sit at my dinner table and listen to boring adult conversation!
At any rate, once again, I managed to fill the table: 10 guests. Consider that until Tuesday there were only going to be 5 of us and so I ended up having to really improvise on some of the recipes!

Shopping for the meal was quite a challenge. I knew even before I went to the farmers’ market that finding mantis shrimps (or canocchie or cicale) was going to be impossible. I searched on Google, on yahoo on the Food Lover’s Companion, in Eric's encyclopedia of food (actually this is his 20 year collection of Cook's Illustrated). I asked the sous chef at the Four Seasons (side note: have any of you ever had the chance to dine at the Chef's Table at Park 75? Oh My God what a treat that was!) and even an experienced fisherman (the fiancee of a colleague). Looks like if you're not in Italy and are not Jamie Oliver you're out of luck when it comes to this fish. So I had to improvise. The description on wikipedia said they're not really shrimp but they could be a cross between shrimp and crab. So I decided to substitute with lobster tails, crabs and shrimp!

Another challenge: ever heard of a fish called John Dory? Quite ugly, last seen swimming in the Mediterrenean Sea? No? Oh well, they have never heard of it at the Farmer's Market either. I made a frantic call to Eric (actually 3 but he didn't answer) and then remembered I could look it up in my Iphone (read: I am addicted to it)! Search: "John Dory substitute". Answer: Sea Bass. Ok, phew, they had that one.

So, I had to really improvise on this dinner but hey, since there is no such thing as Vatican City cuisine, it really didn't matter. Just add some holy water, a little vinsanto and pronto, the best meal is on the table.

To start, I served this little bites called Bocconcini del prete ladro (little bites of the thieving priest). The name can only be understood if you read the recipe. It says at the end that to eat them, one has to turn to the wall and wait for the priest to make the first move... what? As Eric pointed out, must be that Vatican City humour... none of this at my table. Eric prepared this lovely little snacks. They're really pieces of cheese covered with salami or prosciutto and some other herb or veggie. Quite appealing actually and they looked pretty on their wooden fish plates also. Unfortunately can't really see them clearly in the photo, but isn't the table really nice? Oh and even the large fiasco di vino rosso. So Italian! What do you think about the new china? It's our latest addition... fresh from... Business Elite! Eric bought a truck load of plates at a sale at Delta. They're small but I like them.

As another appetizer I prepared a typical roman dish: suppli alla romana. A cousin of this that you might have heard of is Arancini Siciliani. They're balls of risotto (made with parmesan cheese) filled with all kind of interesting stuff: prosciutto, giblets, sweetbreads, veal (I used pork), mushrooms (I used dried porcini). Then you dip them in egg and bread them and fry them. They were supposed to be small balls but they ended up being the size of tennis balls. It's not so easy to make them (Eric filled them up... I really needed the help, I kind of miscalculated the timing of preparing dinner...). They turned out OK. I liked them and they're even better a couple of days later but they were not the most popular item at the dinner table (mind they weren't unpopular either...)
As a primo (first course to non-Italian) I prepared cappelli del Papa or Pope Hats. They're kind of ravioli (I also made the pasta) stuffed with mantis shrimps but as I said, they're not to be found around here so for the stuffing I mixed half crab meat and half the meat of lobster tail and for the sauce I used shrimp. These suckers are really labor intensive but I guess if you're cooking for the Pope... oh heck, does he ever get take out pizza?? As expensive and difficult to make as they are they didn't blow my mind off (but they did get really high scores from some of the guests) and I probably won't rush to make them again although I will go look for these canocchie next time I am in Italy. I just must see if they really exists!
The main course was nothing that the recipe called for. Or rather: I included the cognac and the cream but pretty much made up the entire recipe as I just was running out of time. 30 mins before the guests were due to arrive, I still hadn't started on it, was still wearing my tracksuit bottom and I just didn't want to fry anymore. So I took the fish (sea bass), put it in the oven with some butter, chicken stock, salt and white pepper for 30 mins. Then I took heavy cream and cooked it with onions and - too much according to some - cognac, added some corn starch to thicken it added salt and pepper and just before serving, I poured the whole thing over the fish. What do you know, this thing was actually quite nice. Ok, could have had a little lighter hand on the cognac but I get full points for improvisation here!

I served the fish with a lovely lovely spinach salad called St. Joseph Salad which I found on Catholic recipes on line or something like that. It was delicious. I will make this again I think. But if you're into it, do take a look at the website... it's intriguing.

And dulcis in fundo (latin for "sweet at the end") I made Salame del Papa for dessert. When I was a kid my mother used to make a cake called salame which aside from the hazelnuts was pretty much the same as this one. I wonder if the hazelnuts are what make it so special that it is the Pope salami??? It certainly was nice, I thought. Then again what's not to like: 2 sticks of butter mixed with cocoa powder, hazelnuts and cookies... exactly!!

As is a recent tradition, I prepared gifts baskets for the guests. This time they included olive oil, biscotti (I made those too), vinsanto or limoncello and a "dispensation". This last one was really the lyrics of a song I like called "everybody is free to wear sunscreen" and it was kind of a replacement for the rosaries which I intended to put in the baskets but they only just arrived today... there you have it. Catholic mail order (oh yeah, try and do a Google search for rosaries...). The guests will take them for Christmas I suppose. In the meantime, I think I should start my own rosary to beg for forgiveness of anyone who was offended by any of this. As for me, I only hope that God has a sense of humour...

Finally here's the menu with the scores:
Bocconcini del prete ladro 7.3
suppli alla romana 7.2
cappelli del Papa 8.4
Fish 8.1
St. Joseph Salad 8.5
Salame del Papa 7.4

And next time, it's Z for Zimbabwe.

Stay tuned....